Proof that I retain helpful information every now and then.

Spokane got our first major snow this past weekend, and while I enjoy the four seasons, my affections for that which brings out the worst in people and causes a lot of unnecessary accidents is (much like it's counterpart the Trip to the Mall to go Christmas Shopping) lukewarm at best. But I've lived here long enough to know it can't be helped, and incessant whining does not get you anywhere except a tad closer to being forced to run alongside the car. So let's do the best we can with what we've been handed, and thank God we don't live in North Dakota.

Dad always said that when car trouble hits, walk into Napa and beg stupidity. Except I never really had to beg, as my knowledge (or lack thereof) went on fine display the moment I walked in and said I needed a headlight and when they asked what for, I said MY CAR. But sometimes ignorance is to ones advantage, because they assume you need all the help you can get and that includes cheap parts, just in case you decide to burst into tears. (Which, for the record, has never happened.) And that's how I got a steal of a deal on repairs, prompting my brother-in-law to inquire who I had to sleep with to get that?

They say nobody likes a girl who knows everything, even moreso the one who thinks she does. I've never been in danger of knowing too much, unless you count my experience with teenagers who like to push buttons. Put me in a room full of kids who can't follow directions and I spew control. It's one of my God-given natural abilities, commanding the attention of dramatic children and the occasional pageant mom.

Back to what I don't know. Cars: what makes them run, what fixes them, or what is good for them. (After spending a night helping care for my nephews, I'm thinking it wouldn't be wise to give me that kind of responsibility either.) Then my battery and alternator both died within a few months of each other--twice--and though I'm probably stuck in the 'hopelessly helpless' category, I figured it best to learn some universal need-to-knows. You know, that list of things everyone should know, like how to store bread, write an effective grocery list, walk on ice in high heels, and, how to jump start a car without blowing it up. (Save your comments, it's the small victories).

Part of any good learning process is practical application. This is how I learned there is a mid-20's, Christian male demographic who still believe that women are not capable of anything. I'd call it a theory, but that seems generous.

In Bible study yesterday, a friend of a friend walks up and announces her car, which was parked in the lot overnight due to a dead battery, has been broken into. Can any of us jump it? Yes. So I drive up, attach the cables and she's preparing to start her car when two guys approach us. They're with a nearby church and noticed our trouble, can they help? I look at the cables, do some quick mental work to assess my options, and say DO YOU WANT TO CHECK MY WORK? They nod, and thus inspect, remove the cables and stare at/fuss with them for a few seconds before ultimately putting them back exactly where they were. (Translation: I was right.) We get the car started, and I ask the girl if she has a garage or if she wants to tape over the window until it gets fixed, and the guys are all OH, THERE'S A GLASS PLACE UP THE ROAD, to which I reply that I think few places would be open on a Sunday. They both whip out their iPhones and go to town looking up phone numbers and calling around, only to find out everywhere is closed. (Translation: I was right.) Then the poor girl says she's worried about her battery, and one of the guys says NOW THAT WE'VE JUMPED IT, YOU SHOULD BE FINE then she clarifies that it's died several times in the last few days, so I tell her she can have it tested to know for sure, but that it probably needs replacing. Then I look at the guys and say UNLESS YOUR IPHONE DOES THAT, TOO.

It doesn't. 

But Happy Thanksgiving, Jesus loves you.